XCVI.

time to come back.
but a coffee shop is no place to do this —
so in the words of so many songs ,

when i need it so badly you don't come to defend
is there any way to tell me that you're gonna be a terrible friend

crossing the campus with freshmen
thinking back to those days
visions of lights and a pounding chest
a frontman and a bassist
a torn room
and the earth shakes beneath my feet

and i think you're a contra;

last night, you wouldn't believe
this dream i just had about you and me.
i called you up, but we both agreed.
it's for the best you didn't listen .

thinking back to that night
take me back to that night
and i won't watch your lightning hands,
and i won't watch you in the thrill of life
and i won't make it something else

crossing the campus alone
the light on gatsby's pond
the protagonist of a song
the subject of dreams
the poison in atria
the fear of pride

camera won't say the words
music won't say the words
painting won't say the words
dance won't say
words won't say the words


---


i wish that we could talk about it
but there, that's the problem
with someone new I couldn't start it
too late, for beginnings
the little things that made me nervous
are gone, in a moment

the worst is all the lovely weather
i'm stunned, it's not raining
the coffee isn't even bitter
because, what's the difference?

there's all the work that needs to be done